Tuesday, December 16, 2008
The biggest and most obvious change this year is my new job. Since November I've been an aide in the autism class for this county. I don't usually believe in fate, but I really feel like the stars aligned for me to get this job. I wasn't even looking for a school job anymore, but one just fell into my lap and it was the class I most wanted to be in out of the whole county - and I didn't even realize that until *after* I got the job. Those of you who know me well know that autism is where my heart is, and I really feel like this job is perfect for me at this point in my life. The other aides in the class are wonderful; I really couldn't ask for better coworkers. The kids have some serious problems and we have many bad days, but on good days we get to send some kids home clean and smiling who came in dirty and miserable, and that makes it worth it. (Plus, there's that whole "summer and holidays off" thing. That's pretty awesome too.)
Mama has decided she'd like to maybe start a little home business selling homemade candles, so I bought her some basic supplies. We haven't made any yet, but we probably will during Christmas break. I also would really like to start making jewelry to sell, so I asked for some beads and things for Christmas. Even if these things just stay as a hobby, we love candles and jewelry so having extras around is just fine with us.
Since I was unemployed most of the year, I spent that time playing around and learning. I studied German and I'm getting decent at playing the guitar. I learned some basic watercolor techniques and over the summer I got really interested in world history, mostly from playing Civilization II. I took a bellydance class but I quit halfway through because it was so far to drive. And of course I paid lots and lots of attention to the election - much more than ever before. But my biggest interest was alternative education methods. I spent lots of time reading about Montessori and Waldorf, and then homeschooling, and then unschooling. All of this constant shifting of values and ideals really helped me get a more positive attitude, since I've stopped feeling the pressure to live out some prepackaged life.
As for health, we've been up and down this year. Mama's emphysema has gotten a little worse and she has an oxygen tank, but rarely needs to use it. Otherwise we've been doing pretty well - Mama has only been in the ER once or twice all year (one was a false alarm) and I haven't been at all so far (knock on wood). My PCOS hasn't been acting up too bad, and my blood sugar has even been improving since I started work, probably because work forces me to be careful about eating enough protein at meals since I can't eat at any moment I choose. Oh - I did have a bout of mono in February, which I forgot about. But it wasn't a bad one, and I was unemployed and could get all the rest I needed, so that was fine. I seem to get it every couple of years, but it gets milder each time.
I've been able to do lots of fun stuff with friends this year! In April I went to Arizona and spent a week with Roni and Lyle and another week with Bobbie and Lin, who took me to Sedona and the Grand Canyon. Plus I got to see Megan's Law perform, which was pretty rad. Then in the summer Fez was working in America for a month so he and Terry and I all went to Yasumicon (a small anime con) together in Miami - making that two internet friends (Fez and Roni) that I've met in person for the first time in one year. Not bad. And then in September, Terry threw a party (on my birthday, by pure coincidence) and Spiffy came down for that, so I went and stayed with them for a few days. And at the beginning of December I got to be a bridesmaid in Sarah and Dennis's wedding, which was really beautiful. The sad things this year were that Uncle Bill passed away in I think February, and that Spiffy moved back to New Jersey and Val moved to Boston. I miss them a lot, but I know they're happier than they were living here.
Somehow this keeps slipping my mind, but I also had my graduation ceremony from FCCJ in April. I actually got my diploma in August of 2007, but they only have the formal ceremony once a year so I had to wait. It was a nice ceremony and a lot of my friends showed up for it, which was the best part.
I wouldn't be me if I didn't include totally frivolous fun stuff in here! My favorite TV show this year (besides The Simpsons) has been The Venture Bros., which I've been totally in love with all year, especially in the summer when season 3 was coming out. And of course there's always music - this year my favorite stuff has been Genesis (which I got into like a month after telling Lin I hated them, because I am just difficult that way), Pink Floyd, Peter Gabriel, King Crimson and David Bowie on the rock front, and George Winston, Libera and Secret Garden on the "new age filthy hippie" front. As for Mama, right now she's totally into watching Miami Vice because she apparently missed the 80s the first time around and is just now discovering them. She was really into 80s music too for awhile, but now she mostly listens to 50s on 5 on Sirius-XM.
We got a new cat at the beginning of the year, named Lady Blue, from a friend who couldn't keep her anymore. She's 14 now and I really don't think we were expecting her to be around this long, but she seems to be doing fine and is really enjoying the easy life of an indoor cat. All of our other animals are doing well too, although Jake had ear mites and got a hematoma that had to be removed. (All these old animals we have, and it's the baby that ends up racking up a big vet bill. Go figure.)
And that just about covers what we've been doing this year! I hope you all have a safe, merry and peaceful Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Yule, Festivus, or whatever it is that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy this time of year. Maybe it's vodka. Merry Vodka!
Monday, December 1, 2008
I'll say: "I chose to have this job. I could quit anytime, but I don't because I wouldn't like the consequences."
Hmm... that still sounds kind of yucky and oppressive. But today, instead, I said this:
"I chose to have this job. I could quit anytime, but I don't because there are too many good reasons to keep it."
Ahhh that feels better! Amazing how that one little rewording makes my chest a little less tight and my mood a little lighter.
Choosing something because there are good reasons to do it feels and sounds a LOT better than choosing something because bad things might happen if you don't choose it.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
1. How many songs are on your iPod?
Something like 370 - it's a 2gig Nano and should hold 400 songs, but since I've been listening to so many 10-minute prog rock songs lately, it fills up quick.
2. What music would you want played at your funeral?
Maybe nothing... I've only been to one funeral that had music, and it ruined that song for me forever because it makes me think of that person's funeral now. If I love a song enough to want it played at my funeral I sure don't want to ruin it for my friends and family.
3. What magazines do you have subscriptions to?
I don't. But I do collect random catalogs, and I've about worn out all the ones I have now. I need to request some new ones.
4. What are your favorite scents?
Vanilla, lavender and vanilla mixed, cinnamon... anything that's relaxing and smells like baking. For some reason I also like the smell of house paint.
5. If you had a million dollars that you could only spend on yourself, what would you do with it?
Assuming I'm supposed to spend ALL of it and not save it or anything... I'd take half and go travel the world visiting friends and following concert tours, and take the other half and build a swanky house
6. What is your theme song?
Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. Just because.
7. Do you trust easily?
Not at all, but that's probably got to do with living in a small town more than anything. You trust one person, you better trust everybody in town. I'm more trusting on the internet where I'm at least semi-anonymous.
8. Do you generally think before you act, or act before you think?
I think all the time, though not always about what I'm actually doing at the time.
9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Having to watch the same Wiggles video at work at least twice a week
10. Do you have a good body-image?
12. How do you spend your social networking (Facebook, etc.) time?
Usually doing surveys, that's about all I use it for
13. What have you been seriously addicted to lately?
Prog_lolz, an LJ community that pokes fun at prog rock musicians (who the rest of the internets take way too seriously). I love it to death.
14. Why do people still believe in the supernatural?
The same reason people study quantum physics. The universe does a lot of stuff that human brains can't really understand, and humans don't like to not understand things. So we hazard a guess.
15. What’s the last song that got stuck in your head?
A horridly cheesy Tony Banks song somebody posted on prog_lolz
16. What’s your favorite item of clothing?
I don't think I have one favorite. Lately I've been liking my dressy clothes more, because I have to dress down for my job. I always want to wear what I can't.
17. Do you think Rice Krispies are yummy?
Not really. Even with a lot of sugar, they've gotta be the fastest cereal to get soggy ever.
18. What would you do if you saw $100 lying on the ground?
I doubt I'd even see it, I'm zoned out all the time when I'm just walking around. If I did see it, I'd try and return it.
19. What items could you not go without during the day?
My iPod, food, toilet paper? Rubber gloves and hand sanitizer if I'm at work.
20. What should you be doing right now?
It's a five-day weekend, I can do whatever I want!
Friday, November 14, 2008
1. Please feel free to grab soda and snacks, because I will forget to keep offering them to you.
2. When I decorate my childhood Christmas tree I can't help sniffing it occasionally. (It's an ancient artificial tree that my grandparents bought in the 70s. It still gives off some kind of artificial pine smell.)
3. My favorite thing to cook is Thanksgiving dinner.
4. Free time is something I can't get enough of.
5. That's the thing I love most about my job; my coworkers are a lot of fun.
6. Fox news always makes me think to myself, what the heck?
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to chillaxin', tomorrow my plans include grocery shopping and Sunday, I want to go to Target again!
Sunday, November 9, 2008
That sounds eerily close to my beliefs as a Unitarian. If I had to peg my beliefs, I'd call them panentheist with certain habits colored by my Christian upbringing (I still pray in a similar way to how I did as a child, even though I don't fully believe it's necessary, and I celebrate Christian holidays.) As for Jesus, I surely wouldn't say he "didn't matter" - he changed the world completely, that's for damn sure, and was a wonderful role model no matter your faith - but I don't think you're punished if you don't focus your life on him. A panentheist belief system kind of renders the "son of God" question irrelevant, though. If believing in that brings comfort to people, I wholeheartedly support them in that, because that's one of the main functions of religion. It's just not for me. But it sounds like whatever my dad said to my mom that made her decide he thought "Jesus doesn't matter", was probably quite similar to my own beliefs.
My dad has never been a huge part of my life, and I often wonder what sort of things I inherited from his side of the family. I think it's very interesting that despite never once having discussed religion with him, we came out with the same basic beliefs.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Bold the things you’ve done. And I've italicized the things I've kind of done.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world (I went to Animal Kingdom, which is a Disney park, but that's it.)
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo (if karaoke counts!)
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables (*See below)
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run (Maybe. I can't really remember, but I think I did once, as a kid.)
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied (It doesn't take that much, for me.)
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma (I tried, but they wouldn't let me that day)
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper (I think I have. Again, I don't really remember.)
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
*In high school, I took agriscience and we had to work with a partner to plant vegetables. My partner and I were planting lettuce, and I planted most of a tray and she just planted a few in the corner. I ended up moving away and moving back (long story) and when I came back, only the ones in the corner had grown. Plants do not like me.
Friday, October 24, 2008
1. Right now, I'm feeling tired, but happy, after a long week of job interviews.
2. Exactly where I am, but with a job is where I want to be.
3. How does one stop getting election junk mail? Does anybody really change their vote because of that crap?
4. Following my intuition keeps me on track.
5. Please don't squeeze the Charmin. Or at least have the decency to buy it dinner first.
6. BSC Snark fills me with joy.
7. And as for the weekend, today I'm looking forward to baking a spice cake and making homemade pumpkin spice iced coffee, tomorrow my plans include going shopping with the rest of my friend's bridal party and Sunday, I want to relax!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Thirteen Reasons I Want This Teacher's Aide Job
Today I interviewed for an aide job in a class for students with severe disabilities. I've worked with kids with severe disabilities before, but they were gentle. These children are not. If I get this job, I will have to wear steel-toed boots to work because there are very large children who step on people's toes, and I will have to wear rubber gloves all day for the purpose of constant diaper-changing. Neither of these things particularly fazes me, but I worry about whether I am physically capable of restraining a child that is as large as I am.
Any sane person would run screaming from this job, but I never was completely sane :) So, here are my thirteen reasons why I actually want this job.
1. I want to prove to myself that I can handle it.
This would be a stupid reason on its own, but it's true. I've worked with kids who have such a wide variety of needs that I'd really hate to draw a line somewhere and say "No way, these kids are TOO disabled for me, thank you very much" without actually giving it a try. I've dealt with kids who poop their pants and throw chairs, and it honestly wasn't that awful big of a deal. These kids are just bigger and do it more often.
2. I've never regretted any other work in this field.
The first time I was in a special ed room I thought going over the alphabet with seven-year-olds was more than I could handle (in my defense, I was a recovering "gifted" student and fresh out of high school), but I loved it. The first time I worked with a child who had physical disabilities I was worried I couldn't handle changing diapers and giving him a bath, but I loved that job too. So I really feel there is a strong chance I would end up loving this job too. Maybe I am just the kind of crazy person who enjoys this stuff.
3. Despite being in a school, this is way less schoolish than the daycare job I applied for.
The daycare job, which I'm waiting to hear back from, is basically teaching preschool. Hours and hours of forcing two- and three-year-olds to sit perfectly still and color worksheets and write their letters. Seriously, two-year-olds! I already think five is too young for that crap; I really don't want to be forcing babies to do it. Meanwhile, the special ed job is much more like occupational therapy and babysitting mixed together. The kids don't have to sit in one place unless they're doing some specific task that calls for it, and I'd be mainly working with them on things like communicating their needs. I'd be a facilitator and protector, not a taskmaster. I can dig that.
4. I'd be mainly working with an autistic student.
I've always been really interested in autism - I've read lots of books on the subject, known plenty of people who were labeled as being on the higher-functioning end of the autism spectrum (which is a big headachey subject I won't go into here), and I just generally know a lot about it. I like the idea of a job that lets me use skills I learned basically by browsing the internet during the years I "should" have been in high school.
The classic draw for working in schools. I generally want to smack people who would cite that as a primary reason, because they have no idea what they are doing. But you can't deny that it is a nice benefit.
6. I have never felt more qualified for a job in my life.
I am so, so tired of going to job interviews for jobs working with children, where the interviewer does not seem to give a shit that I volunteered with children for several years. They want to know about paid experience only. The principal who interviewed me for this job, though, was genuinely impressed with the work I've done and saw it as valuable experience. It's nice to be respected.
7. Plain curiosity.
Honestly, I just always wanted to know how the classes for kids with more severe disabilities work. Actually that's what got me into the special ed volunteer work in the first place - I just wanted to know how it worked.
8. More experience to add to unschooling discussions.
Occasionally people come around and want to know about kids with special needs, and it's a hard question because often learning doesn't seem to come as freely and easily to them. I'd love to go back into the world of special ed now that I have an unschooling mindset, and see what I can learn about how these kids learn.
9. I like the idea of a job that requires you to dress down because you'll get messy anyway.
The aides were explaining to me that you can't wear nice clothes to this job (I felt really weird in my suit and heels, but it WAS a job interview...), and one of them said "Yeah, I usually wear a lab coat." I don't think I need to point out how awesome that is.
10. I love active, hands-on, moving-around work.
One reason I have always been drawn to teacher-type work is that I hate student-type work, i.e. office work. I am the kind of person who would rather come home achy from working too hard all day, than be forced to sit still all day. I get achy from sitting still anyway. If I'm gonna be sore either way, I'd rather it be from doing something interesting.
11. I might consider adopting a special-needs child one day.
And I want experience with as many different types of special needs as possible, so that I know what I can and cannot handle.
12. Believe it or not, the money.
Let me be clear: The money, by any objective standard, sucks. But compared to the income level I grew up with, and compared to what I could earn at a non-education job (and all my qualifications are education-related, so I'd be stuck flipping burgers or doing entry-level office work), it's quite nice. Especially considering that whole summers off thing.
13. I honestly believe I am "supposed" to have this job, in some sort of cosmic way.
Call it God, intuition, fate, sheer dumb luck, or whatever, but here's what happened: About a month ago I was desperate for jobs and was applying for literally everything I could. Every time a job seemed promising, the people would mysteriously vanish and not call me back to tell me when an interview would be, or whatever. And something in my gut was just saying Wait. My brain, of course, was screaming that my gut was full of crap (pun not intended, but funny) and that I needed a job NOWNOWNOW. But I just felt this peace about not getting one just yet, and every time I looked at job listings that gut instinct kept tugging at me, telling me I was going in the wrong direction. Then, when it finally hit me that I *was* ready, I just happened to look at the school board website and this job had been posted THAT DAY. I applied for it on the next business day and immediately got called back to schedule an interview.
Of course, if I don't actually end up getting the job, that will kind of put a damper on the whole "fate" idea, but my gut is usually right about these things. And my gut is telling me this job is a good idea, even though my brain is screaming that sane people do not take low-paying jobs where they will get bitten and spat at. But my brain has a track record of being wrong about this stuff, so I'm ignoring it for now. It can handle the paperwork later.
Monday, October 13, 2008
The pop-ups explained that the video was based on the photography of Edward Muybridge. Today I went and read about him (his life was pretty interesting) and then followed the link from there to bullet time, which is the technique they use in the Matrix when the camera rotates around a person suspended in air. That article mentions the Wachowski brothers were influenced by the original Speed Racer opening, which I'd never seen. so I looked that up:
And then it reminded me my mom used to have a toy from (I think) the 60s, that was like a handheld game but mechanical instead of electronic. After some Googling I found it, the Tomy Motocross:
It's hard to tell there how it works, but basically the brown part is a rotating disc with little raised bumps for the motorcycles. You're the red one, and you have to slide that big red slider on the right up and down to navigate around the other bikes. It was a boring game to me, having grown up on Nintendo, but it must have been really exciting in the 60s. I do remember thinking it was neat that there were handheld games before video games.
And now writing about this is reminding me of the Franklin Wordmaster we used to have when I was a kid. Actually, we still have it, but I don't know if it still works. I have it tucked in a drawer somewhere; maybe later I'll take a picture. It's this handheld thing from maybe 1987 or so, and was mostly designed to be used as an electronic dictionary or spellchecker. But it had some games on it too. I used to spend a long time playing anagrams and hangman on it and making it generate random lottery numbers. It was fun to look up definitions too because they'd scroll by on the screen. I didn't have a Gameboy or a computer when I was a kid, but I had that Wordmaster, so I felt like I did.
Friday, October 10, 2008
You are a Hippie
You are a total hippie. While you may not wear birks or smell of incense, you have the soul of a hippie.
You don't trust authority, and you do as you please. You're willing to take a stand, even when what you believe isn't popular.
You like to experiment with ideas, lifestyles, and different subcultures.
You always gravitate toward what's radical and subversive. Normal, mainstream culture doesn't really resonate with you.
1. One of the best concerts/plays/movies I ever saw that I really didn't think I'd like was O Brother, Where Art Thou?
2. A tuna melt is a recipe I recently made that was delicious! (Yeah, we don't do a lot of serious cooking around here.)
3. It's time for me to take a shower, and then make pumpkin bread and warm up apple cider.
4. To hear young girls say they like the way they look is quite refreshing.
5. If I never hear the word toejam again, it'll be too soon.
6. To one side of the curving road was
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to painting in the Louvre, tomorrow my plans include proposing on a Saturday night and Sunday, I want to laze. (I don't have any specific plans, so you get Queen lyrics instead. You're welcome.)
Thursday, October 9, 2008
But it's other stuff too. It's politics - it seems like I'm getting in an argument nearly every other day with someone over politics, and I'm just sick of it. I think it's just hanging in the air right now, with the election so close and the panic over the economy and everything else. I'm not the only person who is edgy. Lots of people are edgy right now, because so many people are convinced, this election, that if their candidate doesn't win the WORLD AS WE KNOW IT WILL COME TO AN END. People on both sides are thinking that way, and it's not making for happy or peaceful times.
I don't like it when other people are divisive, but I really, really don't like the fact that I've become that way. Probably I'm more that way than other people I know. I tend to take politics personally, with a "Republicans want my disabled mother to starve" gut reaction that I developed growing up on welfare in the 90s, when welfare was a hotter issue than it is now. But I've since become that way with other things. My mind just jumps to conclusions too fast. That guy is a conservative Christian, so he must hate everyone who isn't. That car has a yellow ribbon magnet on it, so those people must agree with the war, so they probably hate Muslims. The neighbors have a McCain/Palin sign on their lawn, so they probably
And so today I had all that rolling around my head, and I flipped on the radio and there was "Us and Them" by Pink Floyd. Holy crap I needed that. If anyone wonders why I treat music as practically a religion, this would be a good story to illustrate that, because as soon as the song flooded my ears all the thoughts clicked. This song is about how pointless war is. Both sides are really the same, but everyone thinks the other side is completely different. But in the end everyone is human and has the same kinds of feelings. If everyone would realize that, we'd all be better off. Those are thoughts I have everytime I hear the song, and they're the thoughts I've always had about war.
But this time I kept going. Wait a minute. They're not just talking about official wars. And that's when it clicked, really and truly. People are divisive over wars, but people being divisive is what starts wars in the first place. I'm sitting here professing anti-war beliefs, pacifism and peace and tolerance for other people. And yet I'm having a war inside my mind, clearly marking out my "we" and "you". I'm prejudging people to be prejudiced; I've been a bigot on the grounds that I consider a group to be bigoted. I'm hating people for not hating hate enough. I'm arguing that people who live worlds apart and have wildly different beliefs should be kind to each other, while getting angry at the people I love for differing with me on one or two minor points. It's just as much "us and them" as a war is.
When I was a kid, and a Christian, I always got upset at friends who bragged about following the "rules" of Christianity more closely than I did. I thought they were showoffs who were acting holier-than-thou, as if they thought God liked them more than me because they listened to DC Talk instead of the Spice Girls, and they didn't watch The Simpsons, and they went to church on Sunday and Wednesday, and so on (as if there were anything in the Bible about any of those things). And it took me until today to realize that I've been doing the same kind of smug "I am more moral than you" proselytizing, just with a different rubric of morality. Meanwhile, I've been crapping all over the principles I want to be living by: people come first, friends and family are the most important things, all you need is love, being different isn't a bad thing. I haven't been very true to my own values, or for that matter, to my own religion (for the record, my religion is officially Unitarian-Universalism, not prog rock). There's an affirmation we say at church that begins:
Love is the doctrine of this church,
the quest for truth is its sacrament,
and service is its prayer.
It's rare that Unitarians make an official statement of belief, but when we attempt one, it nearly always includes words like "peace", "love", "tolerance" and "equality". Having chosen this religion because it embodies principles I already believed in, those are words I need to try to keep in mind. Especially since those principles are the ones that made me a liberal in the first place.
I'm glad I was thinking about this stuff, and that I happened to flip on the radio right then, and that song happened to be playing, and I happened to understand the message of it. I'm glad I have music to soothe me and to make me reflect and see my own errors, because I'm too stubborn to listen when other people point them out. And I'm glad I have friends who don't point them out too often.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
On the one hand, time seems to be going too fast. All day today I was convinced it was Monday, then I looked and it's technically Wednesday now and that startled me. And I keep looking at things from a few weeks ago and going "Man, that happened four weeks ago? But it JUST happened!"
On the other hand, it's also going really slow. My birthday feels like it was a month ago, but it was just two weeks. And I looked at the stuff I wrote down that I did yesterday, and thought "I did that yesterday?!" I didn't think I played chess yesterday; it felt like a couple days ago.
I like it when time is slow. I'm right at that quarterlife crisis age, where you're finally, firmly an adult, and you sit back to relax, and then you sit right back up again because you've just realized how fast you got here and how not everyone lives to be 80 like you assume you will. It's scary.
So I like it when things that happened yesterday feel like they were two days ago, and things that happened two weeks ago feel like they were a month ago. Makes me feel like life is longer. Plus, it's fall right now and I like the fall to last as long as possible. The end of fall is right before Christmas, and after Christmas I don't like the winter so much. But October through December is perfect.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
One is Daisy Chains and Laughs, which is just for jotting down what I do each day. I was writing this in a notepad file, but I like the idea of having this stuff backed up somewhere online. Plus, I like reading what other people do each day, so I figured somebody else may enjoy that too.
The other is The Musical Box, which I'm saving specifically for writing about music. (Music posts would quickly overtake this entire blog if I put them here.) I was using last.fm for that, but something about the way the blogging there works bugs me. Plus I want to keep things together on Blogger more, since I have a tendency to strew blogs all across the internet.
Both of those blogs are completely self-indulgent and I offer no promises that they're not totally boring ;)
Monday, September 22, 2008
This is our table, which looks a lot nicer when the cat isn't rearranging it to suit his comfort needs. Those are our regular placemats and candles, and I just added a tablecloth I found in the dollar bin at Target.
This is my bedroom window. You can't really see it, but those are jack o' lantern lights. I got them from Target or Walmart, I forget which, a few years ago. And then there's also a string of regular white Christmas lights. The leaf garland I made, out of silk leaves from the dollar bin at Target. I painted them with glitter-glue and then hot glued them to a string of brown yarn.
And that was my uncharacteristic Martha Stewart moment. Revel in it now, because there probably won't be another one for several thousand years.
Oh yeah, and for good measure, here is a fall meme. I got this from Dawn over at By Sun and Candlelight.
When does fall begin
But we don'
What is your favor
What is your favor
They have a HAYRI
What do you like to drink
I also liked
What is fall weath
Red and orang
I do not know why I assoc
What does fall smell
Yes, if I have money
I like to get stuff
If you could
What is your favor
Do you have a favor
What is your least
What is your favor
What was your favor
When I was 16 I dress